You Can't Sit With Us

I will admit that I was probably as dramatic as any teenager when I went through high school. Self centered, oblivious, a tad bit rude and melodramatic. It seems to be a common thing. And why wouldn't it be? Hormones, hormones, hormones, trying to figure out the world, OH THE HUMANITY! Luckily that doesn't last forever... at least for some people.

I love the way I used to view adults. They have things figured out. They are mature and not like any of the above things I described teens as being. Now that I am officially labeled an adult I see that you cannot escape these things. I may be out of high school but I have yet to get away from the drama. In fact, I don't even remember high school being this dramatic and I think I know why. In high school, it's pretty easy to fit people into general categories. You've got all your pronounced stereotypes and they usually stick together. I happened to be in the "yearbook nerd, friendly, by no means popular, maybe you want to stay away" crowd (if that's a thing). Luckily I wasn't "popular" which I believe reduced my drama intake significantly. Once you leave that social setting, get past college and out into the "real world," you no longer have those pronounced groups. They are all jumbled together in a great big mess of "choose your friends wisely because 50% of the population is batshit crazy in a bad way."

I have encountered my fair share of absolute insane people who I will never understand. Their actions left me speechless, their personalities and words made me sad for the human race. After accepting that there are people who are so incredibly ugly on the inside, I was also able to move on and not be so invested in those who are quite obviously toxic. After all, I have two little spawn who depend on my for everything. Why waste my time with people who are still self-centered jackholes? It's too exhausting.

With all that said, I find that parents are sometimes the worst kind of crazy. Fairly recently I found myself in a situation where I thought to myself "is this really happening right now?" One of my biggest pet peeves is people bragging about how they are bad parents. OK, sometimes I joke that I'm a terrible mom because my kids watched too much TV or they are eating candy or trying some death defying move (that I have previously supervised and know they are capable of). But I was with some moms who were bragging to me that they curse in front of their children all the time and how it's so bad and they don't even care. Look, what you do as a parent is really none of my business and I am not here to judge you. Parenting is hard and you are going to repeatedly screw up. But when you call your kid over to tell me in front of my two year old who is learning her entire vocabulary at the moment that you curse all the time and then you reply with "F*** yeah I do," that's off putting to me. It just is. I have no issue with a potty mouth. I have a hard time not being one when I am away from my kids. But for now, I don't want my children choosing those words. (Ok I'm not perfect. When tiny girl says millennium falcon it's like she's dropping the F bomb and I giggle). But to hear a toddler or elementary school kid choose those particular words and mean them because of what they have heard at home just isn't my cup of tea. When I voiced this I was made fun of. My family is "too white" to "be bad." I'm so sweet and don't like to have fun.

I have to be honest. If these things had been said a few years ago I may have second guessed what I was doing and played along with them to the detriment of my children. But these small people are my whole world and I don't care if these ladies are my BFFS. I have a BFF. I married him. I'm OK if you don't agree with me and I don't agree with you. I'm totally fine if you think I'm lame for not spouting all the bad words I know in front of my very intelligent son who has amazing grammar and my sweet little daughter who can't properly pronounce "falcon" or "reflection." Because at the end of the day the majority of my time is spent with three very important people and they are really the only opinions who will always matter to me on things like this. And in 10 years, the chances that I even remember these people and their ridicule are very slim. 

So I guess the point of this post was just for me to ramble about the crazy "adults" I've met and the progress I've made in not needing to "fit in." Five gold stars and a self pat on the back. Woohoo. 

Oh and because I rarely post on facebook anymore and I'm sure there is some family who are craving  some pictures, I give you these gems:

L would be the laziest dog ever. 

Cuteness survival tactics

Small boy getting into drawing when I
was doodling in my sketch book

Family video gaming

A Time I Had

Oh My Gods!

How do I even start this post? I don't know so I'll just dive in. We were sitting at the breakfast table yesterday when D looks at me and says "So small boy is getting to that age where we should probably start discussing religion with him." A little background here. D and I both label ourselves agnostic. We are good people who respect other people's beliefs whatever they are even if we don't always agree. I don't feel you have to believe in a higher power to be guided by a deep moral code and be a good person.

Now something you should understand is this: pretty much everyone we are going to meet traveling around in D's career field is probably going to be religious. The degree various from laid back, drink your body weight in booze Catholics to end of times, the Lord is coming for us all some sort of Christian (I'm not real clear on the exact title for that). We feel it's a good idea to let Link learn about whatever religions he wants and for both of our kids to choose whatever path, if any, that they want to take regarding faith and belief. We just don't subscribe to organized religion as parents but are more than open to helping our children figure out what they believe and understand the beliefs of the people they will encounter.

So with all that said, when small boy was about 5 I had a discussion with him about why he shouldn't say "Oh my God." Then of course I had to explain God to him. I am maybe not the best teacher for that but I gave him the general idea about God creating everything, etc. At the end of my explanation he came back with "Mommy, that's not even real. There's no way that could happen." Always the scientific mind he was having none of it. So I reserved any further explanation for a time when he was older.

Flash forward to this past weekend. D and I did our very best to give him a rough overview of religion, how there are many different ones, a general idea of an all powerful god, sin, church, etc. I think it's a good idea for him to at least understand what his friends are doing when they say they go to church. Well, like I said before, a couple of agnostics might not be the most worthy teachers of religion because somewhere along the way we ended up talking about Greek mythology and all their gods and Link seemed much more interested in that and whether or not there was a god of lava and volcanoes than he was in learning more about any religion his friends or family may have. We told him that he was more than welcome to ask us anything or learn more about religion. I am sure our friends wouldn't mind sharing with him or even letting him tag along to church.

 Our conversation ended, however, with him wanting to check out books at the library about Greek mythology and, ultimately, with the whole family playing a game we purchased while at PAX called Oh My Gods! reminiscent of a Guess Who type game featuring Greek gods. I suppose we worship the gaming gods.

All hail the gaming gods!

Now this post is not to poopoo on religion and if that's what you got from it you are reading the WRONG blog. But more to point out the way small boys mind works. He likes science and proof. He likes games. He likes volcanoes and he likes learning. This particular interest just happened to take a turn into learning about mythology and a new game. I'm sure at some point he will be interested in what his friends believe. But for now he's still only 6!

A Time I Had

Back to Our Roots

We went to PAX South. It was awesome. I kept trying to think of a way to start this post. There really was no other adequate way to start! 

D and I left the kids with his mom and sister and made the 9ish hour drive down to San Antonio to attend a three day all-out "nerd convention." Most people may think a comic-con is our jam but we are more into gaming so PAX was perfect for us.

THIS IS MY JAM!!

We started every day with early rising, showers (very important in a large crowd), free breakfast, a one mile-ish walk, coffee and then waiting in the queue room with a few thousand of our closest friends for about two hours.

The queue room on Day 1 (we were the crazies toward the front)

 I know that sounds crazy but we were armed with a few card games (we liked Star Realms) and our DS's so the wait time went fast. 

I don't feel like explaining the entire thing to those who haven't been but suffice it to say we had a BLAST. Expo hall, new games, indie games, older games we have never had a chance to try but now had the opportunity, PC games, console games, tabletop games, gaming lounges, awesome panels, concerts, swag, the list goes on. And it was amazing. 

Try ALL THE THINGS!

ALL THINGS. 

D kicked my ass at all the things. I have always said I love gaming but I suck at it. I am OK with this. It was super fun. Among some of the games we tried in the EXPO hall we have backed Invisigun and Karmaka on Kickstarter and you should too because they are fun :-) 

Karmaka demo

The one bummer thing was that some friends of ours were unable to attend due to various life hiccups. So, to include them I made them into "paper people" and they attended with us in spirit. Here's a few of their adventures:

Roadtrip with paper people E and S

Waiting in the queue room with PP (paper people) E and S

Hanging out with D in the handheld lounge

Group pic overlooking the expo hall

Gotta get a pic with a cosplayer

About to go demo some tabletop games

Reveling in the swag

The panels were super fun. I really enjoyed the Make A Strip one:

Initial sketch

Almost done

It was so fun to watch this being created. Mike and Jerry are hilarious (which you obviously know if you have any idea what Penny Arcade is and if you have ever listened to a podcast) and their banter is a treat to listen to. It was really fun to watch the last panel being made. The amount that you can change an expression just by a couple changes to the mouth or eyes is awesome. Mike must have drawn and redrawn the mouth 20-30 times or so. Then he took the audience suggestion to add a cowboy hat to the hotdog fairy. Yeah. It made me want to draw things.

Complete and we watched the whole thing happen. 

We also very much enjoyed the concerts. Nerdy type bands. Ever heard of Paul and Storm? Probably not. They do a great song about how George R. R. Martin needs to write faster. And I have to say, I don't think I have ever been more entertained than I was watching them perform. They were HILARIOUS. There were large bags of ball pit balls involved as well as water bottle chugging, intense amounts of distractions that had my abs hurting I was laughing so hard. 

New song about how George R. R. Martin still isn't writing fast enough

Talented and HILARIOUS. 

We also caught the Double Clicks who were so adorably awkward I could die. I loved them. 

Yes, one of them is wearing a banana costume. And it was amazing. 

Throughout the event they hold the Omegathon. Long story short it's a big ass game tournament, ending with two finalists who compete playing a game. No one knows the final game. This time around it was Goldeneye. Anyone remember playing this on your N-64? The two finalists were "Rugpisser" and "Palpatatertot"and they gave us an amazing competition. One of my favorite parts of being in a crowd like this is there are very few douchebags. When the crowd watches people play all they really want to see is a great competition which means they will root for whoever is losing at the time (mostly, this doesn't count the people who know them personally most of the time). The winner was whoever won 2 of the 3 games. So, 10 kills each round. Each player one a game each and the final game came down to 9-9. It was everything you would want in an Omegathon final. It was amazing.

Super intense. 

Palpatatertot wins!

And now I am back to reality where adults who should be able to handle themselves are throwing temper tantrums. Needless to say, I am having withdrawals. I think we've pretty much already decided we have to go again next year. And it will be glorious. 

A Time I Had

My Tribe

I normally don't dedicate posts to a specific person (aside from D and my kids) but I have a friend who deserves it. I will start by describing her in all the typical ways that she is: she is strong, kind, creative, caring, compassionate, honest, supportive, resourceful and inspiring. I know she is these things to me as well as everyone she meets.
So why am I writing a post about her? A little while ago I texted her to see if she wanted to do something with me. The idea was simple, text everyday (the military separates us from being close and small children make it difficult to do much but text daily), keep each other on track to be healthy, happier people. When I initially spoke with her, in my mind we would just text "hey I did some squats or a minute long plank." Luckily for me she strives for way more and she started sending me daily workouts or as I like to refer to them "C's daily torture." When I woke up completely hungover on New Year's Day, my lovely friend badgered me all day long until I finally did my workout. I had some choice names for her that day but by the end of the workout I had nothing but love for her because she pushed me beyond the point of excuses and laziness and made me do something that makes me better.

C: part of my tribe and a big support in my life. 

I told her I was going to write a post about her but one part of information was missing from my mind. I could not for the life of me remember when and how we met. This is rare for me. So I asked her and reluctantly she told me: "It was after your friend M died in that car crash. You were sitting in the cafeteria, you looked so very, very sad. I gathered every ounce of courage I had, and asked you if I could sit with you. You maybe shrugged your shoulders or said yes or something...I sat down. I am not sure we talked that first time. But we did the next day. And more the next." As back story for this, my best friend for years, M, died in a car crash when I was in seventh grade. The kind of feelings you feel when your best friend dies that young are hard to explain. It's obvious why I don't remember how I met C now but when I think about going through all of that I am so thankful (even more so remembering this time) that I have a friend like her. In her words "I like you. Then, and now. Besides...You are my people. My tribe." I could not have said it better and I feel the same way.

We remained friends through high school and reconnected when we were stationed up in Alaska. Our oldest spawn are about two months apart in age and I know they would be such great friends if we lived anywhere near each other now.

Small boy and Sass around 8 and 6 months old 

I remember going to see her in the hospital right before Sass was born and thinking that I just want to be there for her and help her and that even if we didn't constantly hang out or keep in touch in the future that this is someone who I would always reconnect with in some way.

I can't tell you why I still have this but through all the moving we have done (including my constant dorm and apartment switching during college) I have kept this "happy picture" that she gave me our freshman year of high school.

It usually stays tucked away somewhere in the closet of whatever house we live in, safe with the teddy bear that once belonged to my best friend M, Small Boy's baby blanket with his birthday on it, and various letters and things people have given me throughout the years. I find it and smile at it every time I clean my closet or get nostalgic. I never could throw it away and I think if I ever lose it I will have a good long cry. 

So why am I suddenly dedicating an entire blog post to this one person? Like I said at the beginning, she's helping me in so many ways right now (and in the past). She has three amazing little people and her big guy is away from them all for an entire year. She is "one man banding" it right now and let me tell you, she is doing a hell of a job. Despite the fact that her middle child seems determined to kill himself, her appliances break, and she had to scrape a dead skunk off her driveway (and all the various other things that go wrong when your spouse leaves), she takes the time every single day to inspire me and support me to get healthier. And she lets me do the same for her. It's one thing to tell someone to workout and push them past all the excuses you know they will make but it's another to do that AND lean on them to push you as well on the days you don't feel like it. We are here for each other for the good days. That's easy. But we are really there for the rough days. And C has been there for me since the roughest days I had when I was young. 

So I raise a glass to one of the most amazing women I have ever known and deem myself incredibly lucky to have such a selfless, caring friend. She's my people and I love her dearly. 

A Time I Had

Me and C freshman year high school.

PAX!

Like I said in a previous post, D and I will be attending PAX San Antonio. This is awesome for all the obvious reasons that is PAX but also because:
1. D and I have been wanting to attend PAX for a long time now. The fact that we are close to this one and that D has the ability to take time off is amazing.
2. A kid free trip? Yes please. While Link would be totally fine going to this and he would love it, we are being selfish. We want to go and do all the things we want to do without hearing anyone say they are bored. Maybe in a few years we will take boy child with us. Not this time.
3. PAX!!!!


For those of you who have no idea what I am talking about, we are going to Penny Arcade Expo. Here's a little taste of what Penny Arcade is (warning: language)

Basically we are going to a big fat nerd convention full of all kinds of wondrous awesomeness (tabletop games, videogames, ALL THE THINGS!!!)

We are gamers. We named out first kid Link courtesy of the Legend of Zelda games and our second spawn Kirin courtesy of the Kirin Tor faction in World of Warcraft. How could we NOT attend this if given the chance?! It will be full of awesome cosplay, gaming tournaments, concerts, panels, and awesome. 

So here in a few weeks, D and I will pack up our CLEAN clothes (past attendees love to stress wearing clean clothes and taking a shower and let's face it, big gamers are not exactly known for the best hygiene), our DS's, some snacks and heading down to my not so favorite state to nerd out hardcore. I'm so excited!

And just to add something not to nerdy, here's a picture of my sweet little Inky before the Redskins crushed his heart yesterday:

And a picture of my baby Bug being fabulous:

Oh and did I mention...PAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Time I Had:

Me and some of my most favorite gamers!

Why I'm Switching

There are several reasons why I want to switch from Facebook to Blogging. Social media is a great way to stay in touch but there are many people who just don't want to see what you have to share. Instead of chosing to "unfollow" you, they silently (or actively) criticize what you post. I have a friend who posts a lot about her workouts. While I personally don't mind and her particular journey inspires me, she received a message from one of her "friends" asking her to stop posting her workouts and pictures of her kids. Asking other people to censor themselves for your "well being" is ridiculous. I do know people who I have unfollowed because their posts seem to just be them boasting about how they are better than everyone (I worked out 8 times, ran 20 miles with a stroller uphill in my new shoes, I receive expensive gifts from the hubby, etc) but a simple button click is easy and I still check our their profile for recipe ideas and quick updates of their kids from time to time.

I feel the switch from facebook to blogging will help focus me though. Instead of "omg my kid is awesome because ____" or "I had fun at _____" I actually have to form more complete thoughts and this will make me happier. And I feel it will also give select friends and family a better idea of what we are up to.

It might also be a fun way to share what I'm reading, cooking, etc. Plus, I always like to look back at old blog posts. I actually used to be quite clever. And I can be whiny on a blog and if you want to criticize me, it's slightly more work for you. HA!

A Time I Had:

A fresh start

With the new year always comes goal setting. Some of mine include the cliche "be healthier" but I'd also like to make more time to read and spend less time being a Facebook junkie. It's easier said than done. I take a cute picture of my kids, they do something cool, something fun happens, or I just have information I want to share...I tend to want to open up Facebook and make a quick post. Instead of that, I would like to make a better effort to blog more. This way everything I have to update can be in one post and only the people who really want to see these updates will. Because it's easy to scroll through and mindlessly "like" things on Facebook. If you want to express your "like" on a blog you actually have to comment and in the age of passive liking something I much prefer a conversation!

So I'll start slow with a few updates.
Link:
After we moved to Alamogordo he started school. He was quickly bored in class and after much conversation, Dan and I made the decision to skip him a grade. He is now in second grade and loves it as he is more challenged. After speaking with his teacher I found that he was around the top of his class and the only one to make honor roll last semester. He maxed out the test they are supposed to take at the end of the year. He joined a math club and loves it. He still doesn't enjoy writing all that much but LOVES to read. He set a goal to read 100 books in 2016 and has almost read 10 so far. He is really into the How to Train Your Dragon series right now and loves Diary of a Wimpy Kid. Before winter break I received an email from DSE's gifted coordinator to see if we'd like to get him in the program and get an IEP for him. Of course we do! He starts next Monday and we will have the meeting to write up his IEP next month. Big things from such a small boy. We couldn't be more proud and excited for him.

Kirin:

She's sassy and her vocabulary is steadily improving. So now she is very talkative with the same Bug attitude we all know and love. She has taken it upon herself to become my workout couch. When I workout she tells me "go, go mommy. Mommy workout!" and she likes to help me set up my videos and equipment. When I'm almost ready to quit, she comes over to me and tells me "Mommy, OK!" and pats me on the head (usually while I'm planking or doing some awful ab exercise!) She loves to help me cook as well. She's also a sneaky little thing so she keeps me ever-vigilant!

As for D and I, we are just trying to get healthier. Eating better, exercising more (typical new year goals). We are also trying to plan some trips. Since D is no longer on shift work we have a more flexible schedule. And since small boy is no longer in expensive school, we can pull him out if need be to miss a few days for trips. Among those trips this year D and I will be going to PAX in San Antonio at the end of the month while my MIL comes to stay with the kids (Thanks Laura!). We are also planning a Colorado trip in early June, a Kansas City trip in late July and (fingers crossed) a DisneyWORLD trip in early December. Let's hope nothing drastic changes any of those plans because I'm looking forward to trips that are long overdue! 

So there's an update for any who wanted one (I'm assuming it's mostly family!) and hopefully I will make time to post them more often. Like I said, I would prefer to move more towards this and more away from facebook. Let's make it happen! 

A Time I Had: