Monday, July 2, 2012

A Fine Line

The Perfect Fit
I have recently made a very important discovery. There is a fine line between running buddy and "slave driver."

Slave driver

I should clarify. I always knew this little tidbit but in the past it has always referred to my friends who tried to get me to run. They would either encourage me or push me to the point of not wanting to run. I have never been a runner but for some reason since I moved to Vegas I have decided that I am going to become one. Must be something in the water.

D is a decent runner (thanks Air Force). He has never tried to force me to be his running buddy and I am thankful for that. I am not the type to take to being pushed into working out. I don't respond well. Usually I respond violently. This is bad. So since I now have motivation I just need a small push in the right direction. Like, you know, someone to keep a good pace. Someone that doesn't laugh at me when I look like I am going to DIE A HIDEOUS DEATH after running half a mile! That kind of encouragement. I have three options that are usually readily available. D, Link and Bowser. Let's examine these options shall we?

First there is D.

He's great. He gives me wonderful advice and pushes me to keep going. But like I said before, he's a good runner. He makes me look like an 800 pound fat chick running with a cheeseburger in one hand and a cigarette in the other as I huff and puff down the street gasping for air. "You can go faster" he says. "We will move up to 2 miles" he says. Honey, I'm just trying to make it to the end of the block without puking up my liver and lungs who have decided they would much rather indulge in some wine and some second hand smoke because it would be less work for them.

Next there is Link.

I discovered yesterday that a 3 year old as a "run buddy" is bad on all counts. The little demon in a kid suit is a slave driver. True. He doesn't understand that Mommy doesn't want to "RUUUUUUUUUUUN. Run faster. Keep running. Now RUN. Don't stop." OK kid. 1. There was a car coming. If I keep running we will both die. 2. There is this thing that people who don't run well need to continue doing. It's called breathing. Sometimes I have to stop and convince my lungs it's a fun thing to keep working. 3. SHUT UP! Seriously. He never shuts up. I don't want to have a continual conversation with a crazy person when I am struggling to survive. True story.

And lastly, Bowser. Sweet, wonderful, amazing dog of mine.

I have never been a dog person and quite frankly I think Bowser is a stinky disgusting mess but I love him. I love him even more now that I know he is THE. PERFECT. RUN. BUDDY!
He keeps great pace and if I start walking he pulls me to the side, sniffs EVERYTHING and has to pee on everything he sniffed. Good motivation to keep running. ( I don't think Link or D would do the same...)
He doesn't scream at me to go faster or run further.
He pants louder than I do so I feel like I'm not in such bad shape!
He makes me less of a target for someone who might try and mess with me. Big ass black dog. You probably aren't going to mess with me. We'll cut you.
Because he runs with me now his nails are filed down and we don't have to fight the fight to cut them so often. 
And lastly, he's awesome.

Thanks pup, for training me for a 5K!

A Time I Had

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